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Why men are never depressed

Men Are Just Happier People-- What do you expect
> from such simple creatures? Your last name stays
> put. The garage is all yours. Wedding plans take
> care of themselves. Chocolate is just another snack.
> You can be President. You can never be pregnant. You
> can wear a white T-shirt to a water park. You can
> wear NO shirt to a water park. Car mechanics tell
> you the truth. The world is your urinal. You never
> have to drive to another gas station restroom
> because this one is just too icky. You don't have to
> stop and think of which way to turn a nut on a bolt.
> Same work, more pay. Wrinkles add character. Wedding
> dress $5000. Tux rental-$100. People never stare at
> your chest when you're talking to them. New shoes
> don't cut, blister, or mangle your feet. One mood
> all the time.
>
> Phone conversations are over in 30 seconds flat. You
> know stuff about tanks. A five-day vacation requires
> only one suitcase. You can open all your own jars.
> You get extra credit for the slightest act of
> thoughtfulness. If someone forgets to invite you, he
> or she can still be your friend.
>
> Your underwear is $8.95 for a three-pack. Three
> pairs of shoes are more than enough. You almost
> never have strap problems in public. You are unable
> to see wrinkles in your clothes. Everything on your
> face stays its original color. The same hairstyle
> lasts for years, maybe decades. You only have to
> shave your face and neck.
>
> You can play with toys all your life. One wallet and
> one pair of shoes -- one color for all seasons. You
> can wear shorts no matter how your legs look. You
> can "do" your nails with a pocket knife. You have
> freedom of choice concerning growing a mustache.
>
> You can do Christmas shopping for 25 relatives on
> December 24 in 25 minutes.
>
> No wonder men are happier.

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